Friday, December 22, 2006

It's a Dogs Life

Another long hiatus from blogging and I return apologetic as ever, both for not updating my own blog and for not taking the time out to read any other blogs. What's a guy to do, there's much work and little time to do it. The other day I had to leave the institute early just so I could get home early and clean up my room and wash some clothes.
But that's not what this post's about. Confusion had commented in my previous post the pictures helped in visualizing what i was talking about and Nothingman added that it was time I got myself a phone with a camera. Well... hard cheese, all I can do about it is try extra hard describing stuff.
On that note I think I'll begin with Kadugodi, the area in which I live. I think I mentioned in some previous post that it was a bit of a village, well that doesn't really do it justice. Kadugodi is actually more like an urban village, something you tend to find on the outskirts of any large city. There are narrow alleys, flanked by open drains through which thick black streams flow, there are the cows, the chickens and then the stray dogs.
I think I first developed a paranoia against stray dogs when one bit me when I was a kid. Since then, I've never managed to walk past a stray without my heart taking on a life of it's own. Some times it gets so bad, I wonder how nobody else manages to hear it.
There are so many dogs here, it would be impossible to keep count, according to someone who knows about these things, they've all been neutered, but that doesn't seem right because behind every bitch there runs a pack of puppies, just waiting to grow up and scare the shit out of me.
What I hate about them the most though is the fact that when compared to me, they seem to be leading quite a good life. Unlike most strays, they don't spend all day looking for food and that leads me to believe someone is feeding them. Thus freed of this concern, they spend the whole day, either sleeping or sunning themselves, what time is left, they employ in waging large scale gang war on rivals from adjoining alleys.
Getting stuck in between one of these is like hell. Normally i somehow manage to muster up enough courage to slip past dogs that are sleeping, scratching themselves or pursuing other such trivial activities. Once they start barking, try as I might, I wouldn't walk near them for all the fags in China.
My roommate observed that they idyllic life isn't that great, due to the density of dogs packed into the area, the territories of gangs are typically restricted to a single alley or occasionally to an adjoining stretch of the main road. Any dog that dares set a paw outside its demarcated territory is immediately set upon by dozens of its canine rivals. So far from leading a totally carefree existence, they too are prisoners of their own canine instinct.
Within friendly territory, however, they are free to chase after their tails, snap at flies, chase after speeding cars or pursue any random whim with dogged determination.
They have one tendency in particular that fascinates me, their self-appointed role as moral and social watchdogs. If a vehicle passes through the lanes at a relatively sane speed, they will ignore it, sometimes even consenting to get out of the way. Anyone who makes the mistake of driving fast suddenly finds a whole pack barking their bloody heads off chasing after him. Then there are the rag-pickers. While they ignore the regular morning trash collectors, they seem to hate rag-pickers. They're almost as class conscious as people. They seem to single out the poor and very obviously unwashed as targets for their wrath.
Then there is their mob-mentality, if one dog barks, every other one in a 200 meter radius will heed the call and come to investigate, it's funny sometimes to come upon a pack of dogs, all barking in different directions, sometimes I suspect, they just like the sound of their own voices. Or it would be funny had I not been so damn scared.
It's scary sometimes, the similarity between dogs and us, they're as vivid a reminder as any of our lowly origins.



20 comments:

Anamika Anyone said...

Funny piece.. I take it from your subtle hints that you don't like strays.. :)
Well, I was once chased by a pack one day when I was speeding on a two wheeler so that social conscious thing is totally right.

Kartik said...

I have a love /hate relationship with strays, sometimes I can waste hours, imagining what wonderful lives they lead but when they bark, I run.

Anonymous said...

Dag's day afternoon init... i have the same problem as you... happned to me back in india when the 10 of us where
chased down by 30 something pack at 1 a.m and we where carrying all sorts of musical gears..

But yeah no doubt you own me at writing skills.. well written.. you smitten kitten :D

Confusion Say said...

Actually, it's funny that you mention this. I have been bitten twice. And I too know the feeling of my heart in my throat everytime I pass a leash-free dog. I have even thought of the actions to take if a dog did decide to chase after me. And it sure did come in handy. Where I live there are usually no stray animals...only people's pets that accidentally get out of the house or people who let their pet cats out to roam around. So anywho, I have learned that... (now this is very strange)... that if you repeatedly in a scolding manner tell a dog to "Go Home" it will look at you funny and leave. Has worked like a charm everytime so far. So anywho, back to my story about how I premeditated my escape from a neighbor's Doberman. So I was on my way to school early one morning and as I was walking briskly out to my car in the driveway when I was met head-on with our neighbor's Doberman. The dog stares at me I stare at the dog...and then he starts barking aggressively at me...so I think back to my thought-up strategies...I run making a beeline for my car....I jump up landing on my stomach ontop of the car's roof. It seemed all so much more stream-lined and ninja like in my head...but hey it worked....kinda...so the dog keeps barking at me and I am stuck on the roof of my car now and am scared as hell...so I break out the ol' "Go Home" routine. And sure enough...doggie looks at me funny and runs away.

Hmmm....also just in case these tactics fail...you might want to carry some dog treats so you make friends or throw the snack in a different direction and make a run for it while they are eating it.

And that was Keri's Doggie Tips 101. Please come back next week where you will learn about fending off rabid cat's who have been jailed for identity fraud.

Kartik said...

Lucifer, thanks mate

Confusion, hmm... why do i get the feeling this aint gonna work with the dogs over here. Oh thats right, they're strays... never been trained to go home. Besides, eve if they did, i wouldn't know the kannada word for home.
Hehe. but thanks for the primer, cant wait to learn how to deal with incarcerated cats

Anonymous said...

Dogs.... hmm...I am terribly scared of all animals! Dogs happened to be the first in the list! I have tried doubly hard to follow the rule of standing still when I see a stray dog or act as though I am picking a stone and throwing...but matters have always worsened with those rules!! So you have company when it comes to be being scared of dogs!!

Anonymous said...

We like dogs a lot here, strays or otherwise....we feed them our choclates and after that the dogs tend to sleep for quite long periods of time...we still have not been able to figure out why.

no, I'm just kidding ... dogs scare me and i don't like them a lot but you can try feeding cxhoclate to the ones you don't like...

and hey so what if you updae once in a while at least you do and it's worth waiting for your posts!
Cheers:)
merry christmas and new year jab aayega tab bolunga :))
N

Anonymous said...

Man... I used to be scared shit-less of stray dogs chasing me when I was a kid... I once saw a friend of mine running at top speed (as fast as his fat body would allow), screaming at the top of his voice for help while a stray dog (bare fangs, saliva dripping) ran after him (also at a great speed)... Though I've never been bitten or chased but I have that memory etched in my mind !

But as I grew older and bigger in size I was able to control my fear more and more... Now I'm able to pretty much pass them without much worry... but then there is always that crazy dog that will growl, bark and dare you when u cross his 'territory'... for them... I have this kick-in-the-face routine I have thought of... but never tried... :-p

Terra Shield said...

I'm terrified of stray dogs... but I detest cats even more

Anonymous said...

A well written post. I love dogs. In fact my very first post ws about my pet Lab Sherlock.
Wishing you a (rather premature)Happy New Year!

Confusion Say said...

Yeah, I'll be in Florida over New Years holiday visiting TMK and his wifey. So, have a great New years!!

R said...

Wish you a Happy New Year, Kartik. I've had my hands full and I haven't found the time to blog lately. The new year has begun on a good note!

Dunno why blogger is still branding me 'anon' on your blog.

Saffronmantra said...

Dude, very well, but neutered dogs dont really matter! They all have the same sweet tooth.

Unknown said...

Well written Dude.... keep up the good work!!

And the Dog mentality... thats a good analysis you have on them...
Take care... Meet you Fri/Sat!

R said...

Kartik, mon ami, I hope you are alive. :-p coz your blog is stone cold dead.

Kartik said...

i know i know, i wish i could do something about it.. i will i will.. just you wait.
cheers :D

Pallav said...

yaar kuch to likh de!! aankhe sooj gayi aapke intjaar me!!
come back man.,...write something...so much shit is going on in the world!

indian lucifer said...

4 all i can guess now is that your dead...!
.................
........
....
(is that true?)

Pallav said...

Dude...kartik...are you really dead?? oh how will you reply to that??
Dude..we people still come to your blog....you should have todl us before dying...
:P

reply if you are alive. ok
N

Confusion Say said...

You've been tagged! Check out the meme on my page yo.