Apart for other things, one of the first points noticed about Indian men is our excessive usage of profanity, profanity that often employs references to women. Women see this as being indicative of our opinion as to their social standing. Think about it, the logic seems pretty sound, women are though of as being so lowly that most commonly used profanity centres around women.
Quite some time ago, when the whole ‘item number’ scene was rearing its ugly head and Mallika Sherawat had just emerged from the pool of Bollywood wannabes, I just happened to watch ‘The Big Fight” on NDTV. The issue being debated (or shouted about, as is often the case on that particular show) was something like the portrayal of women in media. The main portion of the show was devoted to the topic, however it did predictably spill over on to the status of women in society. Although there is much to be said on the issue, being a man and an Indian one in particular, I feel I wouldn’t be able to do justice to the issue, if you want to read more on it, read this post by Erasmus-in-India in her Blog . Now back to the topic; one of the speakers, a woman, raised the point that even Indian profanity is directed at women. Erasmus-in-India agrees and writes;
“…I am not too astonished to find such an insult in the Hindi vocabulary. India is a male-dominated country where women are not always perceived at their fair value.”
I agree that Indian profanity is indicative of our perception of women, but I disagree with the conclusions they draw. The commonly held view is that women are seen as inferior and so are included in profanity and by associating a man with female genitals for instance, gives a particular word or phrase its negative connotation. Most people believe that the female genitals themselves have a negative connotation.
The way I see it is completely the opposite way, though my interpretation doesn’t do much to vindicate our perception of women either. Consider the most commonly used and most offensive insults used, they revolve around the Ma-Behen (mother and sister) system, they mainly involve referring to their genitals or sexual intercourse with a mother or sister. English has a corresponding insult for the latter but has nothing similar to the former. So why is calling an Indian man ‘Ma(or Behen) ki chut’ (mothers vagina) an insult? I don’t think it’s because of the negative connotation associated with the genitals alone, but rather holds a deeper meaning based on our role as an Indian man. Traditionally Indian men are expected to act as protectors and providers, women are seen as helpless dependants to be looked after. A man is expected to protect physically and safe-guard the dignity of the women he is responsible for, particularly his mother and sister. Thus referring to the genitals of a mans mother or sister gains additional significance as it crosses the line between insulting a man and insulting his masculinity by referring to those under his ‘protection’ in a negative light. A number of movies made in the 80’s and early 90’s highlighted this point, the worst a movie villian could do was to either kill the hero’s mother or rape his sister. As consequence inneumerable inconsolable heros hunted down and killed villians who had committed either (or in some cases both) of the crimes.
Women are seen as lesser humans, however there is no fundamental negative connotation associated with them as many allege. They are seen as property, something to protect against the world.
This is also why many men have no qualms against ‘eve-teasing’, women other than those you are responsible for are seen as some-elses property, something for which you bear no responibility and are thus free to treat as you see fit. Women are respected but not universally, we only extend our respect toward those under our control, all others are seen as fair game.
Our country, our motherland also receives such contradictory respect. Never talk badly about India in front of an Indian, there is a good chance you won’t live to describe it. This confuses a lot of foreigners who visit our country, they assume that people who litter the streets, have no respect for law and openly talk depreciatingly their own country wont really mind if they add their two cents worth. Most quickly realise how mistaken they are, the motherland like the mother is not to be discussed lightly. We draw a firm distinction between us and them, indians and non-indians and expect others to remember their place. To us India is never in the wrong, Indians are the greatest people and our mothers and sisters are temples of virtue.I’m not saying that we are right, but this is just the way we are.
Quite some time ago, when the whole ‘item number’ scene was rearing its ugly head and Mallika Sherawat had just emerged from the pool of Bollywood wannabes, I just happened to watch ‘The Big Fight” on NDTV. The issue being debated (or shouted about, as is often the case on that particular show) was something like the portrayal of women in media. The main portion of the show was devoted to the topic, however it did predictably spill over on to the status of women in society. Although there is much to be said on the issue, being a man and an Indian one in particular, I feel I wouldn’t be able to do justice to the issue, if you want to read more on it, read this post by Erasmus-in-India in her Blog . Now back to the topic; one of the speakers, a woman, raised the point that even Indian profanity is directed at women. Erasmus-in-India agrees and writes;
“…I am not too astonished to find such an insult in the Hindi vocabulary. India is a male-dominated country where women are not always perceived at their fair value.”
I agree that Indian profanity is indicative of our perception of women, but I disagree with the conclusions they draw. The commonly held view is that women are seen as inferior and so are included in profanity and by associating a man with female genitals for instance, gives a particular word or phrase its negative connotation. Most people believe that the female genitals themselves have a negative connotation.
The way I see it is completely the opposite way, though my interpretation doesn’t do much to vindicate our perception of women either. Consider the most commonly used and most offensive insults used, they revolve around the Ma-Behen (mother and sister) system, they mainly involve referring to their genitals or sexual intercourse with a mother or sister. English has a corresponding insult for the latter but has nothing similar to the former. So why is calling an Indian man ‘Ma(or Behen) ki chut’ (mothers vagina) an insult? I don’t think it’s because of the negative connotation associated with the genitals alone, but rather holds a deeper meaning based on our role as an Indian man. Traditionally Indian men are expected to act as protectors and providers, women are seen as helpless dependants to be looked after. A man is expected to protect physically and safe-guard the dignity of the women he is responsible for, particularly his mother and sister. Thus referring to the genitals of a mans mother or sister gains additional significance as it crosses the line between insulting a man and insulting his masculinity by referring to those under his ‘protection’ in a negative light. A number of movies made in the 80’s and early 90’s highlighted this point, the worst a movie villian could do was to either kill the hero’s mother or rape his sister. As consequence inneumerable inconsolable heros hunted down and killed villians who had committed either (or in some cases both) of the crimes.
Women are seen as lesser humans, however there is no fundamental negative connotation associated with them as many allege. They are seen as property, something to protect against the world.
This is also why many men have no qualms against ‘eve-teasing’, women other than those you are responsible for are seen as some-elses property, something for which you bear no responibility and are thus free to treat as you see fit. Women are respected but not universally, we only extend our respect toward those under our control, all others are seen as fair game.
Our country, our motherland also receives such contradictory respect. Never talk badly about India in front of an Indian, there is a good chance you won’t live to describe it. This confuses a lot of foreigners who visit our country, they assume that people who litter the streets, have no respect for law and openly talk depreciatingly their own country wont really mind if they add their two cents worth. Most quickly realise how mistaken they are, the motherland like the mother is not to be discussed lightly. We draw a firm distinction between us and them, indians and non-indians and expect others to remember their place. To us India is never in the wrong, Indians are the greatest people and our mothers and sisters are temples of virtue.I’m not saying that we are right, but this is just the way we are.
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